38 Undateable Online Dating Profiles:
Quick Recap: I did an Experiment with my friend Bob Ladewig where I created 38 Undateable characters and I tracked the results. It started with a Crazy Cat Lady and then spiraled into more characters. And a live stage show (#DateMe: An OkCupid Experiment).
But not all the characters could make the show. And the interactions are too funny (and Unbelievable!) not to explore.
Every Week I’m going to post one of my FAKE Undateable characters. As well as some of the REAL verbatim interactions I had with OkCupid users.
So let’s do this…
Meet Prinzess Angie…
The main Profile Pic looks like this online.
Note: This is a Current Screenshot of her profile. So Angie is 30 now, but years ago when I did the actual experiment she was only 26.
Here’s The FULL Profile:
The Profile Pictures:
Note: The Captions are the REAL Captions on the profile.
So Who Responded To This Absurd Character?
PrinzessAngie was a very Popular character.
She received tons of messages. The most popular (and obvious) of which were about…
The Enchanted Forest
We got that response a lot.
But kudos to the Super Hot username “Pushbackthetaco”.
I don’t think I gave these guys the innuendo filled answers they wanted…
And this guy really pushed the limits on the forest details…
Playing Along
Lots of guys got into the fairy tale fantasy…
Yep. I’m easy.
Aww…simple and cute.
But I might prefer this flowery language…
Haha! You had me at “exquisite greetings”, Monsieur Frank!
I might be into that.
But the real (unhealthy co-dependent) me would probably date this guy:
Chilvary
I thought it was adorable how detailed people got.
Uh-oh. Started out cute but got a little creepy. And once again, you have the usual…
The Lewd
Ok. Could’ve been worse.
Again. Not too bad.
But can you see Elsa or Belle having a one night stand with a “Casual Sex Prince?”
And then there’s this….
When People Get Gross, I Play Dumb.
Or Rather, I STAY IN CHARACTER At ALL TIMES. Because, Hey, I’m A Professional!
Calling Me Out
Of course, not everyone believed I was real.
Umm… no. I just have no life…and created a bunch of fake characters…because I’m CRAZY.
Haha! I love a good call out. Yes, all of my pics are incredibly staged. Good catch!
Most people liked me or were in the joke.
But not everyone…
Hey, if I’m going to do this, I deserve to have some haters.
Also, mission accomplished. I WANTED her to be Undateable!
The Sweet
I’d be remiss if I only posted the gross, ridiculous messages.
There are some really fun, nice people out there.
Awww, he read my profile AND he was sweet.
Uh-oh. I know he was joking but that made me feel bad. You’re cute! You’re cute!
REAL Verbatim Dialogue. Read On If You Dare…
Here are some of the more interesting conversations.
A Potential Hero…
Oops. Didn’t give that guy what he wanted and never heard from him again.
OR perhaps he’s out lost in a forest looking for me and has no cell reception?
This Guy’s Really Concerned About The Literal Details…
Read to the end. I was genuinely confused!
A Sneaky Prince…
HA!!! That Guy Was A Cheater!
Obviously, I blurred out part of his email address. But I never replied.
Then I got this THREE MONTHS LATER.
Buddy, we’re done. We were done when you said you had a Duchess!
Is Prinzess Angie Undateable?
Turns out, she was pretty popular. And she seemed to fulfill a lot of fantasies.
Would YOU date a bratty princess?
What would you message Prinzess Angie to get her attention?
Comment Below.
And stay tuned next week for another UNDATEABLE character.
Much Love,
Robyn
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